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Band No. 4 -- Hooray!

Janis Joplin -- vocals
Robert Johnson -- guitar
Rick Danko (The Band) -- bass
Jeff Porcaro (Toto) -- drums

This is arguably the most celebratory band in all of heaven, which, when you think about it, is really saying a lot. Hooray! takes its name from the fabled deal struck between guitarist Johnson and the devil, wherein Johnson learned to play reeeeeeally well in exchange for his immortal soul. No one knows exactly what went down during negotiations to release Johnson from his contract, although Hooray! does seem to record an awful lot of gospel albums. It should be noted that the Lord has yet to buy Joplin a Mercedes-Benz, a color TV, or a night on the town.

Band No. 5 -- The Def Rainbow Cricket Experience

Buddy Holly (Buddy Holly and the Crickets) -- vocals
Steve Clark (Def Leppard) -- guitar
Noel Redding (Jimi Hendrix Experience) -- bass
Cozy Powell (Jeff Beck Group, Rainbow, Whitesnake, Black Sabbath) -- drums

Ritchie Valens and the Big Bopper sit in occasionally at performances, but this is Buddy Holly's band all the way. It's a much harder sound than we're used to hearing from him thanks to the rest of the group, which draws mightily from psychedelia and heavy metal. While they play some new stuff on occasion, the Def Rainbow Cricket Experience are also fond of covers. Holly's vocals on "Iron Man" and "Pour Some Sugar on Me" are especially memorable.

Band No. 6 -- Who's the Double Zeppelin Queen?

Freddie Mercury (Queen) -- vocals
Stevie Ray Vaughan (Double Trouble, solo work) -- guitar
John Entwistle (Who) -- bass
John Bonham (Led Zeppelin) -- drums

Easily the worst name of all the heaven bands but arguably the most perfectly arranged. Mercury and Vaughan were masters of their crafts on Earth, and when you combine that with eternal joy in paradise it's really something to behold. But can the operatic showmanship of Mercury meld with the blues guitar roots of Vaughan? Yes. Of course. It's heaven. And the human language lacks words to describe the sound. Entwistle's taciturn onstage presence enhances Mercury's theatricality, while Bonham's masterful drumming rounds out the combo. The group is a big favorite of Abraham Lincoln, Thomas Edison, Cleopatra and Moses, all of whom are never seen without a WtDZQ? T-shirt.

Band No. 7 -- Hendrix Ramone Ramone Moon

Joey Ramone (Ramones) -- vocals
Jimi Hendrix (Jimi Hendrix Experience) -- guitar, vocals
Dee Dee Ramone (Ramones) -- bass
Keith Moon (Who) -- drums

It doesn't seem like it should work but, again, heaven being heaven, it's a thing of beauty. Hendrix and Joey sort of trade off lead-singer duties, since Jimi is fairly good on vocals and Joey never really has been. But they make it work: When Jimi sings, Joey joins in on harp. He found that harps are all over the place up there and that he really had a hidden talent. The sound is kind of an eclectic, soupy, psychedelic, punk style where somehow there are lengthy guitar solos and extended discordant drum solos, yet all the songs still come in at around two minutes.

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